


Puzzle

by SusieBeeca



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Crossword Puzzles, Gen, Other, Pearl being salty, Sudoku, Swearing, greg is clueless, it's only rated teen and up because of swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-05 19:42:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16373840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SusieBeeca/pseuds/SusieBeeca
Summary: Pearl has a puzzle to solve, and so does Greg. To her great annoyance, he asks her for help.





	Puzzle

Pearl sighed, finished the last block, and flipped the page. She still had no idea why Garnet had recommended this little game to her; as a rarified Pearl, she’d been created with a perfect understanding of math, so she found these “Sudoku” things trivial at best and boring at worst.

Greg, however, seemed to be transfixed to the puzzle-book he’d been given. After pulling the pencil from behind his ear and licking it a few times, he looked to her. “Hey, Pearl?”

She filled in a nine and a one, and then turned to him with heavy-lidded eyes. “Yes?”

“Five-letter word, starts with an H,” he said. “’The Greeks thought of them as women with vulture wings, but we know them as nagging’.”

“Harpy.”

“Oh! Of course.” He grinned as he scribbled in the answer, but then the pencil went up to his chin, tapping as he thought. “Damn. ‘When water is drawn across the cell membrane---‘”

Pearl gritted her teeth, and jotted down a two. “’Osmosis’.”

His face brightened. “Hey, that’s it! I had no idea how to fill in that ‘O’!”

“You’re welcome.”

Then, for about two blissful minutes, he was silent. With a grin, Pearl completed boxes that added up to seventeen. She swallowed her giggle---she had no idea why she liked prime numbers so much, but damn was it satisfying to scratch in that last box!

“Oh, this one’s just impossible.”

Her shoulders sagged, her eyelids drooped, and she let out a very, very deep sigh. “What is it, Greg?”

Even without looking at him, she could tell his dumb, meaty face was all screwed up. “’The act of throwing something or someone out a window’? What could that---”

“De,” she began, slowly, “Fen. Es. Tra. Tion.”

The sofa jerked under her when he jumped in glee. “Whoa! That’s it! Haha!”

Pearl frowned in confusion; she knew humans were easily excited, but this seemed downright silly. He was making stupid whooping noises and pounding his fist in the air.

“This is awesome!” he hollered as he held up the book. “I can’t believe how good I am at crossword puzzles! I’m the best!”

She bit her lip. “Eight-letter word, starting with a B. It’s slang for when male cattle defecate.”

He was still doing his victory dance, but paused long enough to say “Is that ‘bullshit’?”

Pearl smirked.

It took him a moment, but…. “HEY!”

**Author's Note:**

> Anyone else read MAD magazine? ;)
> 
> Also, my favourite word in the English language is 'defenestration'. It's so ridiculous because it's overly complicated and yet has almost no purpose. Like me!


End file.
